God's gifts... Wanting more gratitude
More.
Praying. Asking God for more. To be more fully present. To live each moment now, not thinking-- en-drenched -- in the next.
More doing what matters. Less doing, just doing. Stuff that doesn't matter in ten minutes, ten hours, or ten days. And more doing what matters to the glory of the One who made me, not doing just to get it done.
Reading these...A Holy Experience: When Longing to Choose Joy, Please Don't Miss It... A dying woman's words about the present gives perspective. Again. I need it again, each day, each moment.
Still working on my list that never ends. Recuperating from a week of husband's late nights getting home, kids pushing, potty training failing, me running out of patience. And yet grace. By His grace, my thankful list overflows. Had to keep turning to gratitude; how else will the moments matter, be meaningful?
Even as I cleaned bodily filth off the walls, carpet, sheets, quilt, pillows, bed frame... How can I -- even then -- how can I be thankful? By God's grace, I did... I found God's gift; humor in the moment of disgust. Thank you, God. I want more. More Jesus in each moment. More grace from the source that never dries up, never exhausts of the fullness of love.
And now to list the gifts of moments from the last week...
- Abel and his Papa, always riding together
- Completing a craft started in the spring
- Abel heading to his room to find his own fun for a few minutes while I started lunch
- Abel's first split lip... and it's swift healing
- Being prayed for... Bible study leader petitioning God on my behalf, that I might experience that sustaining of God's grace, not running empty while caring for my son alone
- Adrianna and Scott taking off on a daddy-daughter weekend to Houston to see family
- The answering of God: patience, not shortness; grace, not frustration... the sustaining to care for this little life, even while alone with him for three days
- Library time for the first time with just Abel
- Mesmerizing skies, with dewy fog clouds drifting away before my eyes
- Abel finding fun in the closet while I dressed for a night out with a couple of ladies
- Abel calling his doggy: "Ruuuuthhhieee"
- Abel pretending to call his sissy while she was away, "Aders! O, Aders!" and then telling me that it was just like Grandpa Bob did (and he did)
- Garage saleing with Abel
- Enjoying grocery shopping with Abel alone... store after store, yet fun, smiles...
and even a mother and daughter approaching us to tell us they had been in three stores that we had, and they were so delighted to see Abel's antics, his overflowing joy
- Finding a new thrift store to discover with Abel
- God sending neighbor kids to play with Abel after the full day of shopping... allowing me to recharge... allowing Abel to enjoy kid-play time
- Abel wanting to do lacing with me
- Fresh, local peaches with yogurt
- Abel showing: "This one," to which garage sale truck he earned after a small potty training success
- Finding another delicious gluten-free bread recipe
- Abel's impressive climbing skills
- Adrianna's long-awaited shoes arriving in the mail
- The best after-school snack: molasses cookie dough
- Appreciating Adrianna's use of words to explain her feelings ("I am frustrated.")
Praying. Asking God for more. To be more fully present. To live each moment now, not thinking-- en-drenched -- in the next.
More doing what matters. Less doing, just doing. Stuff that doesn't matter in ten minutes, ten hours, or ten days. And more doing what matters to the glory of the One who made me, not doing just to get it done.
Reading these...A Holy Experience: When Longing to Choose Joy, Please Don't Miss It... A dying woman's words about the present gives perspective. Again. I need it again, each day, each moment.
Still working on my list that never ends. Recuperating from a week of husband's late nights getting home, kids pushing, potty training failing, me running out of patience. And yet grace. By His grace, my thankful list overflows. Had to keep turning to gratitude; how else will the moments matter, be meaningful?
Even as I cleaned bodily filth off the walls, carpet, sheets, quilt, pillows, bed frame... How can I -- even then -- how can I be thankful? By God's grace, I did... I found God's gift; humor in the moment of disgust. Thank you, God. I want more. More Jesus in each moment. More grace from the source that never dries up, never exhausts of the fullness of love.
And now to list the gifts of moments from the last week...
- Abel and his Papa, always riding together
- Completing a craft started in the spring
- Adrianna excited because Scott bought pellets, excited that cold weather is coming
- Adrianna winning one of the prizes in the grocery store coloring contest
- Abel's first split lip... and it's swift healing
- Adrianna and Scott taking off on a daddy-daughter weekend to Houston to see family
- The answering of God: patience, not shortness; grace, not frustration... the sustaining to care for this little life, even while alone with him for three days
- Abel pretending to call his sissy while she was away, "Aders! O, Aders!" and then telling me that it was just like Grandpa Bob did (and he did)
- Garage saleing with Abel
and even a mother and daughter approaching us to tell us they had been in three stores that we had, and they were so delighted to see Abel's antics, his overflowing joy
- Finding a new thrift store to discover with Abel
- Abel wanting to do lacing with me
- Fresh, local peaches with yogurt
- The return of the two... and hearing excited reminiscences
Comments
A BEAUTIFUL list once again.
Grace. Please repeat. Grace.
God has done the work and desires for you to partake. Lavishly.
You, Sweet Sis are way too hard on yourself.
Embrace grace.
Praying for you right now.